My Guardian Star

Sighs

2012-02-15T18:40:00.001+08:00

really feel helpless

I am really sympathy with your situation. I have no idea how to help you nor how to console you at this moment. I have tried and still trying to find people. But, fail :(

Now, I know. Who is your real friend when you need help. To most of them, whenever it involves money matter, they will shy away from you and give numerous of ridiculous and lame excuses. Whattheheck! Can't you just be honest to me, or to yourselves at least? If you are not interested, say then. Why must you have to crack your head and think some nonsense to cheat me or you think it sounds convincing to others? Sighs.

I really hate growing older and older. I hate to see the true colour of human and the world. And I hate to see things slowly turn sour. This is really unbearable. Stop telling me this is life because this is not how life suppose to be!!!

I have too many in mind, I don't know how to voice it out though. How? Funny eh. I don't have the courage nor the confidence to fight back.

Yes, sad to admit that I'm a coward :(

Signing off.

Happy New Year!

2012-01-01T02:36:00.000+08:00

2012

Here it comes. My new year. 2012.

If the prediction of 2012 is true

I hope it won't come

I want to live longer!

I haven't had enough of my life

It is just first year of my tween!

And there are so many things still undone

So many resolutions that have not been fulfilled!

And of course,

I wanna get married, tour around the world, get more money and many many more...

A new year, a new hope.

❤

And I had a wonderful new year eve with a bunch of lovely friends.

Let's make a deal that next year, up to Genting!

2012 will be a better year! ❤

Signing off.

米修米修 ❤

2011-12-28T02:14:00.001+08:00

我好想你哦！

此時此刻，只想擁抱你。

好想時光快快飛逝，來到你和我相約的那天。
如果一天有四十八小時，我會將二十四小時都給你。

我要得很簡單。

一個肯定的眼神
一個安穩的擁抱
一雙溫暖的手心
還有
一顆愛我的心

就夠了，真的我會很滿足。

不過偶爾，我也會貪心。
想要你多陪陪我
想要你能浪漫點
想要你給我小驚喜
想要你可以看透我的心

骨子裏的我，還是個小女生
會幻想著偶像劇的劇情
男主角總是很浪漫，很完美。

我知道，我想太多了。

我只想好好愛你而已。

❤

聖誕節快樂 ♥

2011-12-25T02:45:00.005+08:00

我很快樂

在這個溫馨的季節裏
你陪我度過了

謝謝你，我的傻佬

❤

希望明年的今天，你還會牽着我的手，一起度過。❤

祝天下有情人，終成眷屬！

你（們），最近好嗎？

2011-12-24T01:25:00.002+08:00

希望一切安好

剛剛，突然想起了你（們）
曾經是我的朋友的你（們）

曾經
我們為了考試一起打拼

曾經
我們一起打閙一起分享

曾經
我們好得像哥兒們一般

又曾經
我們以為我們的友誼會天長地久

不過
這也都是『曾經』而已

情和義
究竟哪個比較重要

選擇
從來沒有對或錯

你（們）都選擇了愛情
犧牲了我們的友情

當時的我的確很痛心
很恨很討厭你（們）

不過
現在的我長大了
思想也不一樣了

現在的我可以明白理解
你們當初的選擇

只是一切都太晚了
我明白得太遲了

和你（們）相處的那段時間
我不后悔不遺憾

很慶倖我可以認識你（們）
我們認識，暸解，相惜

隻是任誰也沒想到
最后的我們會變成熟悉的陌生人

謝謝你（們）曾經是我的好朋友
我真的很希望你（們）過得很好

有時我會在想
我們會在街上碰到嗎

我們會有怎樣的反應呢
你（們）會對我微笑點頭嗎？

過去的就讓它隨風飄去吧
一切都已經不再重要了

衷心祝福你（們）快樂安康
這次，我們都要很幸福

會的。

❤

終于。放假了！

2011-12-21T15:19:00.000+08:00

放假了！放假了！好開心 ♥

一切都過去了。

原來，我是幸福的。我現在才知道，才體會到。

謝謝妳。

謝謝你愛我。

謝謝你在乎我。

謝謝你一起陪着我.

謝謝妳對我的不離不棄。

現在的我，才知道。

我對你的愛，真的越陷越深了。

深到我自己也會覺得害怕。

害怕失去你。

害怕妳沒在身邊。

害怕沒有你的每一天。

我很笨。

不過

我已經回不去了。

對你的愛

我已經無法自拔。

❤

怎么辦。我好愛你。

Signing off.

If and only If

2011-12-12T14:10:00.000+08:00

How I wish I could be hardworking.

Something. There is something that disturb my mind. Something that stops me from studying for my papers. Something. Something which I don't even know what is that. Grrr...

I need a clear mind, an empty brain. I need a "ctrl", "alt", "delete" button!

Signing off.

坚。强

2011-11-15T01:19:00.000+08:00

可以不要吗？

以前的我，可以假装坚强，装做自己很勇敢
还没认识你的我，也可以把自己掩饰得很好
从前没有你的我，绝不会让人看见我的眼泪

可是，
遇见你的我，可毫无保留的表达自己
放了自己所谓的自尊心，所谓的骄傲
和你在一起，学会了面对真实的自己
不再夜里盖着被，一个人偷偷掉眼泪
可以任性的撒娇，让一直你宠爱着我
牵着我手的你，让我知道我不再孤单
抱着我的你，让我明白累了有个依靠
亲着我的你，让我体会了甜蜜的感觉

这，一年又两个月，14个月，426天
你让我习惯了，习惯了有你的一切
我就像吸毒上了瘾一样，无法自拔
我无法再回到过去的我，我办不到

你说，我要学会坚强
我说，好，我可以。

你说的每一字，每一句，我都很认真
因为你之前的这句话，我的心，冷了
开始将自己的心上锁，渐渐封闭起来
尽量不在你面前哭了，我强颜欢笑着
我忘了，忘记该怎么对你诉说心底话

这样的我，比以前更痛苦
那样的我，快乐不起来了
所以我再次选择当我自己
当那一个刚刚遇见你的我

可是，为什么呢
总是在我最高兴的时候
狠狠的在我的心上插一刀

今晚
你说，我要学会坚强
我说，可以不要吗？

我累了，你懂吗？
累了怎么去坚强。
我想要的很简单
是你在我的身边

在我心累的时候，让我有个归宿
在我哭泣的时候，让我有个依靠
在我狼狈的时候，让我有个拥抱

也许我要求太多了吧。。。

:)

2011-10-27T00:15:00.003+08:00

Insomnia

2011-10-17T04:31:00.000+08:00

I want to get some sleep :(

Staying this late, currently the time now is 4.27am, I couldn't sleep. My head feels a little light but my brain can't shut down and let me have some rest. :(

WHY? Sighs.

When I needed you the most where are you?

Signing off.

Frustration

2011-10-12T15:01:00.001+08:00

Stop getting on my nerves!

Uh-please people. Stop scaring me with the unnecessary rumours. My heart couldn't take it! It has been consecutively two days, the same thing happened again. AND AGAIN!

Now, I have insomnia because of this! Damn. Stop it! PLEASEEEEE! I need some PEACE!

Signing off.

The Smurfs ❤

2011-10-11T17:30:00.001+08:00

they are freakingggg adorable!

Yes, call me childish if you insist. I just loveeeee them ❤ And they are blueeeeeee! *heart melts* They are irresistible!

Been dying to watch before finals, but had no time. And after 1432198234565th days, I finally got to watch! A MUST WATCH SHOW! If you love cute creatures.

For every sentence they said, they love to add in "smurf". For them, "smurf" means everything! They use it whenever they like it, want it or just simply smurf you! It's shoooooooo cuteeeeee ❤ and they are tiny, little cute creatures.

How I wish I could have a REAL smurf with me, so that I could smurf with him whole day long. Oh-ya! I have been addicted to their song. The HAPPY song!

La La La La La La Sing A Happy Song

La La La La La La Smurf the whole day long

❤

Brainy Smurf. My favourite character ❤ I love the way he says [ according to my calculation, ...]. And the way he explains his theory is sooo cute. Everything about him is adorably adorable! And he is the hero, he saves his people! Blueee moon! How I wish moon we have now is also blueee.

Clumsy Smurf! Indeed, he is veryyyy clumsy. He couldn't walk properly, hold properly. Also he is a destroyer! He would destroy every single thing he has. But, he has bluee thumb! :) And in a way, he is also cute in the end of the story.

Papa Smurf. Mind you, he is 546 years old! Older than me, papa :)

The only Smurfette in the Smurf Village. I like the part where the dress being blown up. So cuteee ❤

Grouchy Smurf! He has really bad temper and has rarely smile. But I like the part where he keeps talking to the M & M green plushy. He could talk and talk, and the plushy didnt answer him! Aww...

Gutsy Smurf. As his name says it all, he is braveee. And I like his costume, especially with his [ I ❤ NY] red underwear. He is so funny and cuteeee ❤

I know, I have been repeating cute for everything! But, they are really CUTEEEEEEEE! ❤ Even though, there are not all the smurfs here, but I would want to know them all! Why TV didnt show any The Smurfs cartoon at all, my childhood would have been better. Argh!

I want to watch again, and I can watch again, and again, and again!

Signing off. Off to smurf in the toilet. Have a Smurfy dayyyy!

My Superman Daddy ❤

2011-10-04T17:28:00.002+08:00

he is the greatest dad on earth

Losing one, teach me to learn, to appreciate and to love more.

Back then, I have never thought that my dearest family would leave me in such a young age. I do know that people will leave one day but I had always thought there was still time for me. No, reality always like to crush my dream. Without any notices, my mum left us when I was form 4. Everything happened in a sudden, no one had ever expect it to be happened, not even doctor. And that's why I hate hopes, it always failed me again, and again. My dearest grandma (maternal side) left me, too. I had a deal with her just a couple days before her death was announced. She promised that she would stay to see my wedding. Again, my hope was crushed into its thinnest piece. If getting elder means leaving more people, I'd rather to stay a kid forever. Goodbye, I have never learned to say Goodbye, nor I was given a chance to say it. If there is a time machine, I would smile and say goodbye to them before they leave me. Cause at least I know, I know that one day we will meet again. Seriously, I missed you and I will keep missing you :(

My cute Ah-Ma ❤

On top of all unfortunate, I am really really reaaaaallly thankful and grateful that I still have my dad. My SUPERMAN dad. Since the day he started to take over a mum's job, he is doing it good, more than just good, he is fantastic, awesome, great and all-the-compliments that you could think of. From cooking, ironing clothes, and now he do sewing! Words are not enough to describe his coolness and greatness, I know and feel it by heart. ❤

I love him more than ever day by day. Even though there are times that I would get mad at him for the unreasonable moments, I still love him ❤

I was really regret that I did not take much photos with my mum. I could only flip those old albums to try to remember her face, every possible moments with her.

I wouldn't let the same regret happens again. Twice, enough to tear my heart apart. ~~No! No more third time~~! I hope God could grant me this little little wish of mine. To let my dad stay with me, at least until he witnesses and shares every possible moments with me in the coming future. :)

Signing off

An unspoken secret

2011-09-18T14:02:00.000+08:00

left a deep maroon scar on my heart

Just getting a little emotional, being an arrogant and ignorant me. *slaps*

Lock me in the room, weep silently, I would be fine, I guess. :)

The fact is, you have never tried to walk in to the inner world of mine.

Signing off. Off to study.

One Year Anniversary ❤

2011-09-15T17:45:00.001+08:00

turning a new leaf :)

Time flies. Fast. Just like in a blink of eyes. Very fast indeed. We have been holding hands, walking through the moment of happiness and sorrow together for the entire one year. Of course we have also came across some critical stages where I wanted to give up. But, your determination has defeated me. Thank you for not giving up on me.

Looking back what we have gone through over the one year, ups and downs in life, laughter and tears, arguments and patching up, I am glad I have you with me. ❤ Every obstacles that we crossed, our bonds get tighter and we know each other bit by bit. You may not be my perfect boyfriend and I am not a perfect girlfriend. Imperfection in both of us that make us a suitable couple. :)

I treasured and cherish every moment that we have been together and I believe we can create more lovely memories in the coming future. ❤

Our very first trip together to Port Dickson. Even though that time, we were not officially a couple yet, but there was many unforgettable moments with you. The first unofficial kiss that you secretly stole from me. Holding my hand beneath the table. My heart first time pounded fast and my face was flushed red. ❤

One year ago, 14 September 2010, our very first date at Sunway Pyramid. You asked from morning till night, and I finally nodded my head on the way up to Asia Jaya LRT station. ❤ For the very first time, I felt lucky that I have someone who loves me back as I do. I thought I would lose you because you wanted to push me away to someone else. But, now I am yours and don't you ever push me to other people.

Our first UTAR's trip together with a big bunch of friends. The most touching part would be, you were holding my hands tight and told me that you won't leave me alone no matter what situation. And together, hands in hands, we have conquered the Panaroma Hill to watch the sun rise and also the rainbow waterfall. ❤

Our first wedding dinner together. Ms Lim's wedding dinner. For the very first time, you saw me in one piece dress. And during the video-playing session, you whispered to me, "you will be my pretty bride next time". I blushed and told you that we couldn't be sure if we could go that far, you just smiled. But deep down in my heart, I was really touched by your words even though it might be a lie, a beautiful lie indeed. :) And that night, we cuddled together and slept for the first time. ❤

My very first birthday celebration with you. A very last-minute and rushing celebration cause our finals ended late. Even there was no cake, no present (I requested you not to buy), the best present for me would be you being next to me. ❤

Our 10th Month anniversary, where we started to count down our first year anniversary. ❤

Last but not least, our very first year anniversary. You couldn't be with me :( But I am touched by these three people helped us to celebrate in replaced the presence of you. The present that you gave me in advance is enough to cover the disappointments. But, hopefully, if there is second year, I hope that we could celebrate together. ❤

If I could have three wishes now,
First, I hope that the both of us could pass our final exams with flying colours.
Second, I hope that we could have many more years without much arguments and sadness anymore.
Third, .............. *keep in heart*

Signing off. Off to continue study.

A friend in need is a friend indeed

2011-09-11T21:33:00.002+08:00

but you wouldn't let me help, or even know :(

To you-know-who-you-are,

I seriously want to know what has exactly happened to you, I don't care if it's a long story, I AM WILLING TO LISTEN. I wanted to help or even by your side to give you my full support. But, I feel myself helpless hopeless at the moment, without knowing anything, but only a little blur information that you spared to me. I could only guess and guess from your words, you refused to tell more. :(

If I am not the one you can believe the most, tell someone else that you have faith in! Because at least the 'someone' knows and can help you a little, in case anything goes wrong. But, why? Why you are not doing so? Keeping to yourselves, not letting your family know, no one could help you. *sobs*

I don't know how you found out that 'problem' cause you have never gone through a proper investigation about it. Don't simply make assumptions about it when you are unsure about it yet. Please. Please. Please. I beg you, please take good care of yourselves. Do whatever you are supposed to do, no matter for yourselves, your family or your friends.

You are getting on my nerves whenever I tried to talk you out but failed. Being pessimistic one, this-is-so-not-you! You always tell me to be optimistic and you even assure me that you will be positive on it. Keep worrying about you non-stop, thinking that will you be alright, even cause me to have insomnia at times. Every time when you posted something weird, maybe some people wouldn't know the hidden meaning, but I know, I know that you are making me worry again. :(

I don't know what else I could do for you. Go all the way to your apartment, just to know the truth? ~~Or maybe I should tell your parents?~~ I know if I do these, you will hate me forever. And that's why I am so miserable right now. You refused to tell but I insist to know. Sighs. You are causing me to have a headache at the midst of final examinations.

Being alone in the darkness is scary, I know that. And deep down in your heart, you know it well than me. But I just wanna let you know that you are not walking alone, not in the darkness, friend. I would hold your hands, crossing the obstacles together, if you allow me. :)

I am waiting, waiting for you to tell me the truth, waiting for the old you to come back. The guy who loves to smile and love seeing people smile. :)

PS: I know that I do think a lot sometimes. But it means that I care, I care about you because you are one of my important friend. I could never bare to see you in pain but being helpless. I could not stand a chance to lose you. I hope you could realise that you are really not alone, you don't have to be alone facing the problem. You have the ones who love you with their heart, the ones who want you to be happy, the ones who care so much about you, the ones who cherish every moment with you. Remember, you have your family and your friends as well that love you the most :)

PPS: I love you too, as a friend, LCW! :(

From the one who care for you :'(

Signing off. Sighs.

High Hope, High Disappointment

2011-09-06T00:31:00.000+08:00

A wrong decision :(

HAHA.

I am dumb at this moment. Thank you for making me to realise that. The moment I captured your relief smile, my heart sank. I did not expect that from you. You crushed my hope, my happiness and excitement.

I should not have came back. I thought it was a surprise to you and you would be excited. But, your reaction didn't turn out as I thought.

Alone, once again. Hugging my pillow and bolster, hoping that I could sleep well tonight. It has been quite some time that I have not been sleeping alone. Maybe I should get used to it again. :(

I miss home now. I want to go home. I don't want to stay here. Not alone. Sighs.

Signing off.

Should I Or Should I Not

2011-09-02T21:57:00.002+08:00

plucking flower's petals

Day Twenty-Eight

Should *first petal*

Should Not *second petal*

Should *third petal*

Should Not *fourth petal*

..........

Argh!!! *Roses drops* I have to recount already. *sobs*

Never mind me. I have gone insane these days. Gah!

Signing off. :)

11 Months 1 Week & 1 Day

2011-08-22T01:50:00.000+08:00

three weeks and six days more ♥

Day Seventeen

In between these days, I did wonder that if we should continue on
There were times that I almost want to give up
And without fail, your tears always soften my heart

To the outsiders, we would look like a pair of oh-sweet-lovebird
But no one knows what we have been through all these while
And I doubt anyone would believe that we even closed to the ~~last stage~~

Reminiscing our past memories
those days you would post sweet statuses for me on your Facebook's wall
those days you would join me in the organising events to share the ups and downs
those days you would send me a three to five pages of message telling me about your feelings
those days you would save credits to call me for one hour just to listen to my voice
those days I would secretly buy you presents
those days I would reply you with the same length of message
those days I would chat with you on MSN until late night
those days I would run into your warm arms and you hugged me tight
those days we would appreciate every single seconds that we spent
those days we would hug and kiss at the secret backdoor or rooftop
those days we would stay back and study together
those days we would capture every moments that we have spent together

All these memories, I treasure them deep in my heart
Perhaps, good things are meant to only happen once
You change, I change, we have changed
I know those memories are meant to be just memories
We could not replay them nor we could forget them
Whenever I mention that I miss those moments
You are always giving the sigh-and-sorry-look
And seriously, it hurts my heart at that moment

Writing these thoughts down, jotting them with words, leaving a mark on my blog
Something to be revised, to be laughed at, maybe, in the future
Right now, I just want to record down every single piece of my mind
Too many thoughts have been pondering in my brain, no where to be dumped
Phew~ I AM FEELING SO GOOOOOD NOW! ♥

On this day, 22th of August 2011
It shows that we have been hand in hand for 11 months 1 week and 1 day.♥
Four ones, it might only happen once in our love story
The next four ones would be 11 years 1 month and 1 week
A day that cannot be dreamed of, a way too long to figure out our relationship by then
But I know, even if we really go into separate ways one day
We will be good friends, you have promised me :)

Happy 11th Month 1 Week and 1 Day Anniversary ♥

Besides than love, I am grateful that I have a bunch of oh-sum friends that accompany me all these while ♥

You girls never fail to cheer me up :)

Signing off.

Trying One More Time

2011-08-06T01:43:00.000+08:00

for you, for me and for us

Supposedly, I must be at my study desk now, read notes and prepare for tomorrow test. For the very first time, at this late moment, I have not touched any topics yet. Not at all. The study mode is currently OFF. :(

Day One

Everything was perfectly fine
Just like the first day we were together
A soft kiss on my cheek is a beautiful full stop of the day

I wish the following days would be as happy as yesterday.
~~No tears, no sorrow, no heartbreaking~~
Only love and passionate exist between us

I have too many reasons to continue staying besides you.
Leaving you at this moment is not what I wanted

I ♥ the way you are and I hope you accept the way I am
And I will wait, wait for you to grow
This is my promise ♥

This is what I called ♥

Shall get some quality sleep before start to hardcore on the last minute study. *fingers crossed*

Signing off. Off to bed.

回不去，也跨不去

2011-08-05T01:02:00.001+08:00

这样的我们还能走多久

以前，我不敢去想我们的未来

我只是抱着一种『过一天，算一天』的心态

我害怕我怕这都是一场梦

梦醒了人走了心也碎了

不敢抱着太高的期待期望我们会一直走下去

因为期望越高，失望就越大

不过，不知从什么时候开始

我开始有了幻想幻想着你我的未来

我们会手牵着手紧紧地不曾松开

一起见你的朋友我的朋友

一起看日出日落

一起参加毕业典礼戴四方帽

一起踏入社会找工作

一起见彼此的父母得到他们的祝福

一起步入礼堂披上婚纱

一起建立属于我们的家我们的避风港

一起期待小生命的诞生我们的第一个宝宝

一起抚养他长大成人

直到有一天孩子长大了我们都老了哪怕躺在病床

我们都会一起牵着手提醒彼此『该吃药了！』

对，曾经的我，抱着这么美好的幻想

在路上看见爷爷和奶奶还手牵着手

我会想将来的我们会像他们一样吗

梦想与现实都是有差别的

不是所有的梦都能实现

再多美好的幻想也会被残酷的现实狠狠的摧毁

努力过了哭过了心痛了那又怎样

不是不爱而是太爱了我们都用错的方式来爱对方

换来的是一次又一次对彼此的伤害

伤痕累累的我们还能走下去吗?

不是每个对不起都能换来没关系

每次的伤害真的能当作没发生过吗

也许你能。但我，不能。不能！

你有你的坚持我有我的想法

性格顽强的我们谁也不肯退让

周杰伦有一首歌歌词说穿了我们

『我知道我们都没有错只是忘了怎么退后』

每次的争吵都是你不甘愿让着我

不是因为你觉得我对而是你懒得和我争辩

现在的我对我们的未来画不出模样来了

前面的影子变得模糊了好像离我越来越远

心是真的痛了痛却不只是个形容词而已

今晚的风特别冷但风吹过刺痛的不是我的皮肤而是心

心痛得连呼吸也变得很窒息

回想着我们的过去幻想着我们的未来

有种回不去却又跨不去的感觉

我想过放弃放了你也放了在自己

但我始终都没有狠下心

有太多太多的理由让我想再努力看看

我们不是不爱了只是习惯了彼此的存在

而忘了爱情是什么感觉

此时此刻的我只想跑

一直跑跑着一个没有终点的跑道

一直跑跑到一个没有人的地方

一直跑跑到自己忘了呼吸

让心暂时麻痹暂时停止跳动

就让我无止境的跑。。。

Just Smile :)

2011-05-30T02:30:00.000+08:00

Smile because nothing is worth your tears :)

其实

一个人可以带着过去的创伤继续，
只要他把悲伤放在心里的一个圈圈里，
不要让苦痛浸染了他的整个生命，
他就可以像正常人一样快乐的生活。

当一个人悲伤得难以自持的时候，
也许，他不需要太多的劝解和安慰，训戒和指明。
他需要的，只是能有一个在他身边蹲下来，
陪他做一只蘑菇。

我可以蹲下来，陪你做一只蘑菇。　　
我愿意分担你的不快乐，只是当你的世界下雨时单纯的为你撑起一把伞。　　
请你不要封闭自己的心，一个人承受那么多。　　
你知道的。只要你睁开眼，你从来都不是一个人。

至少还有我 :)

________________________________________________________________

『想哭就哭，想笑就笑，不要因为世界虚伪，你也变得虚伪了。』

『有一些人活在记忆里，刻骨铭心；有一些人活在身边，却很遥远。这个世界很大，即使是擦肩而过的陌生人，相遇时也飘散着淡淡的缘，所以，缘来是你，我惜；缘尽你去，我放。』

『每个人都会累，没人能为你承担所有的伤悲，人总有那么一段时间要学会自己长大。』

『思念是一种病。幸福的是你病了，他也病了；不幸的是，他康复了，你却一病不起。』

『现在要一份纯粹的爱情，很难。放不下骄傲，放不下身段，参杂太多人太多事，彼此撑着，最后以爱不起、不适合收场。陪我们走到最后的人，也许算不上是我们最爱的，但会是最合适的。这样也很好，不是吗？人生本不完美，也许懂得知足。年轻就是这样，有错过有遗憾，最后才会学着珍惜。』

『你整天愁眉，自然生就苦脸；你一脸怒气，必定生成怨相；你乐观和善，当然慈眉善目。哲人道：10岁前的相貌，是父母给的，30岁后的相貌，是自己修的。表情是瞬间的相貌，相貌是凝固了的表情。从今天开始，每天微笑吧，哪怕你遇见的都是烦心事。』

『出生一张纸，开始一辈子；毕业一张纸，奋斗一辈子；婚姻一张纸，折磨一辈子；金钱一张纸，辛苦一辈子；荣誉一张纸，虚名一辈子；看病一张纸，痛苦一辈子；悼词一张纸，了结一辈子；淡化这些纸，明白一辈子；忘了这些纸，快乐一辈子』

『或许你不会再回来，或许我们不会再见面，或许你找到了她，我找到了他，或许我们在各自的新生活里不再存在。我还是会怀念，不是怀念你，而是怀念我爱过你。谢谢你给了我最温暖的爱，虽然最后的最后，我们还是没有再相逢。我想快乐，为你，为我，为我们。我知道即使没有当初的爱，你还是愿我一切安好。』

『我常常觉得，流下一滴眼泪，需要很久很久。人越长大，就越习惯于压抑内心的真实感受，不再放声大哭放声大笑，什么都只是淡淡的点到为止。好像越来越没有什么事情，可以让伤心到立刻落泪，最终，我们变成了不会哭的小孩』

shared by 愛、文章

signing off. off to bed. Remember to smile :)

Tell Me Why

2011-05-23T03:52:00.001+08:00

Just Tell Me Why

Is it so hard for me to get work done the way that I wanted? I just want to finish everything smoothly and the way I wish. I have already minimized my expectation to the minimal level, and I didn't ask for much. I just wanna upload my City Tour Video successfully on the net so that they can have it. But, why? Why always all these bad luck keep happening on me? I am really not asking much. :(

I just wanna let my tears to pour out now. Pour everything out from my dry and tired eyes. Drain away all my disappointment, tiredness and depressions in my heart. I am sooo stressssss :(

I really wanna have a nice sleep. Hugging my teddy tightly, no dreams, and wake up as a brand new day :) I miss my teddy. I need a hug now.

Signing off. Off to work again

Movie Reviews 2010

2011-04-24T19:00:00.003+08:00

I couldn't believe I watched so many movies last year. And I want to watch movie so badly now. :'( I MISSED OUT LOTSA NICEEE MOVIE THIS YEAR :((

Sighs. Study time again. :(

Signing off with heavy-hearted.

So Much Time To Study Yet So Little Time

2011-04-11T19:10:00.001+08:00

yes, I know. :(

I have been constantly complaining that I have not enough time to complete my daily tasks and study. But the fact is, I DID NOTHING OVER THE WEEKEND NOR THE FREE TIME. In fact, I have been wasted my hours, minutes and seconds on useless things.

WHAT ON EARTH AM I DOING?

I easily got distracted with the electronic devices and surroundings. Not to mention, him. To be frank, these are all my excuses that I hypnotized myself for not moving on. My mind recently swayed away with my emotions. I don't know what's wrong with me. And I did not bother to find out. Letting myself indulge into the emotional state not trying to pull myself out of it.

Perhaps, I am not giving the best out of mine because I am into the things that I like? Thus, I have no motivation at all to study or even look at the notes. Well, see, I am giving excuses to myself again. :( I did not know how to express out my feelings or even my thoughts. AS MYSELF have totally no idea what I want.

I know, I should move on. I know...

Signing off. Off to dinner.

总算

2011-03-15T01:17:00.001+08:00

松了口气

『快节奏』
在音乐的世界我明白我跟上
在大学的生活我迷失我跟丢

喘不过气也无从去透气
这感觉糟透了不过也该学会适应
环境不会配合我那我只好配合环境

感恩庆幸的是
在我最需要依靠支持安慰的时候
你就像我的专属天使般出现在我的眼前 ❤
简单的一封简讯一通电话你飞奔的跑回来
为的是见见我抱抱我哄哄我确保我没事

你的肩膀快被我的泪水湿透了却毫无怨言
我受了委屈你比我还要气声言要我我讨回公道
为了此事你第一次对我吼对我凶
我知道你心疼我宝贝我不忍看到我被伤害
可是傻佬啊我不想不想你和任何人结下梁子

我只想在我伤心难过疲惫的时候
你在我身边陪陪我抱抱我哄哄我
就真的真的已经足够了
再多的难关再多的悲哀再多的委屈
我相信只要有你我就有继续走下去的勇气

❤

现在的我好想好想放自己一个悠游漫长的假期
去哪里都好只要离开这里就好
压力烦恼一切琐碎的事统统都暂时抛开
只想你牵着我我握住你一起旅行
让我撒撒娇调皮的捉弄你
然后躺在你的胸膛上望着夜空听着我们不规律的呼吸声
直到我们渐渐地进入恬静的梦乡❤

不过在那之前我想我们应该好好坐下
谈谈我们的问题想想解决的方法
我真的不想更加不喜欢
我们总是为了相同的人事物而伤了感情

我很珍惜我们之间的爱情感情
还记得吗我曾经告诉你
我不轻易爱人一旦❤上了就很难放手

我真的很想回到当初的我们。。。

14.09.2010 First Date ❤

14.02.2011 Valentine's Day ❤

Signing off. Off to bed :)

簡單的道理，幸福一輩子

2011-02-23T21:33:00.002+08:00

每个人都明白；不是每个人都做到

一生只談一次戀愛是最好的，經歷的太多了，會麻木；

分離多了，會習慣；換戀人多了，會比較；

到最後，你不會再相信愛情；會自暴自棄；

會與你不愛的人結婚，就這樣過一輩子。

關於愛情：

不要認為後面還有更好的，因為現在擁有的就是最好的。

不要認為還年輕可以晚些結婚，愛情是不等年齡的。

不要因為距離太遠而放棄，愛情可以和你一起坐火車的。

不要因為對方不富裕而放棄，只要不是無能的人，勤勞可以讓你們富裕的。

不要因為父母反對而放棄，你會發現因為這個原因而反放棄的愛情，將是你一生的悔恨。

其實對於愛情，越單純越幸福。

也許愛情是一部憂傷的童話，惟其遙遠才真實。

放棄一個愛你的人並不痛苦，放棄一個你愛的人那才痛苦。

若是有緣，時間空間都不是距離，若是無緣總是相聚也無法合意。

凡事不必太在意，更不需去強求，就讓一切隨緣。

逃避不一定躲得過；面對不一定最難過；孤獨不一定不快樂；

得到不一定長久；失去不一定不再擁有。

愛是一種享受，即使痛苦也會覺得幸福；

愛是一種體會，即使心碎也會覺得甜蜜；

愛是一種經歷，即使破碎也會覺得美麗；

不要因為寂寞而錯愛，不要因為錯愛而寂寞一生。

關於伴侶：

伴侶不是結婚時發誓非你不娶或非你不嫁的那個人，

而是發現你身上有許多缺點仍然選擇你的那個人；

伴侶不是生活中你愛吃黃瓜他也愛吃黃瓜的那個人，

而是你吃蛋白他吃蛋黃的那個人；

伴侶不是天黑了和你一起手挽手走進飯店的那個人，

而是守在門口巴望你回來共進晚餐的那個人；

伴侶不是和你大談愛情，把“我愛你” 掛在嘴邊的那個人，

而是和你平淡的嘮叨柴米油鹽、鍋碗瓢盆的那個人。

在幸福的婚姻中，伴侶已不是一個具體的人，

而是你和他在幾十年的歲月中沉澱下來的：

一份默契、一份溫情、一份平淡、一份理解、一份寬容。

愛他就要讓他開心，這就是伴侶……

關於承諾：

在古希臘傳說中，情侶都將戒指套在對方的中指上，

因為他們相信那兒有一根血管直通心臟。

所以戒指的意思就是用心承諾！

但是人世間有多少愛能生死白頭，又有多少的情可以天長地久？

所以你選擇共度一生得未必是你最愛的，你最愛的未必能和你共度一生。

多少的有情人走不進彼此的今生，只能苦苦地相約於來世；

而多少的男男女女走過愛情走進婚姻卻不會再珍惜彼此的付出。

所以記得珍惜你愛的人，把每一個平淡的今天當成是彼此相依的最後一刻，

好好握緊愛人的手，即使他容顏已老，即使他滿面滄桑，

那也是你記憶中永恆的溫馨。

別忘了守住對他的承諾，別忘了牽住他的手，

一生一世一輩子……

關於人生：

人生如夢，歲月無情。

驀然回首，才發現人活著是一種心情。

窮也好，富也好，得也好，失也好。

一切都是過眼雲煙。

想想，不管昨天、今天、明天，能豁然開朗就是美好的一天。

不管親情、友情、愛情，能永遠珍惜就是好心情。

記得有一個經典短信這樣寫著：

曾經擁有的不要忘記；已經得到的更加珍惜；

屬於自己的不要放棄；已經失去的留作回憶；想要得到的一定要努力；

累了把心靠岸；選擇了就不要後悔；苦了才懂得滿足；

痛了才享受生活；傷了才明白堅強；

總有起風的清晨；總有絢爛的黃昏；總有流星的夜晚。

人生就像一張有去無回的單程車票，沒有彩排，每一場都是現場直播。

把握好每次演出便是對人生最好的珍惜。

把握現在，暢享人生！

關於友情：

有一天，友情和愛情碰見。愛情問友情：

世上有我了，為什麼還要有你的存在？

友情笑著說：愛情會讓人們流淚，而友情的存在就是幫人們擦乾眼淚！

朋友就是：偶爾會為你擔心、向你關心、替你操心、

想你開心、逗你開心、請你放心。

朋友之間，懂得關懷才是難得。

傷心時不妨和我說；痛苦時別忘了跟我講；有病時別忘了通知我；

困難時記得要請教我；失望時要想起還有我；開心時更不要忘記我。

朋友的定義，就在於此。我們是朋友，這就夠了。

關於微笑：

被人誤解的時候能微微的一笑，這是一種素養；

受委屈的時候能坦然的一笑，這是一種大度；

吃虧的時候能開心的一笑，這是一種豁達；

處窘境的時候能自嘲的一笑，這是一種智慧；

無奈的時候能達觀的一笑，這是一種境界；

危難的時候能泰然一笑，這是一種大氣；

被輕蔑的時候能平靜的一笑，這是一種自信；

失戀的時候能輕輕的一笑，這是一種灑脫。

不管是有什麼事情，為了什麼原因，

我們每天都要開心一笑~~

關於生活：

日出東海落西山，愁也一天，喜也一天；

遇事不鑽牛角尖，人也舒坦，心也舒坦；

每天領取謀生錢，多也喜歡，少也喜歡；

少葷多素日三餐，粗也香甜，細也香甜；

新舊衣服不挑撿，好也禦寒，賴也禦寒；

常與知己聊聊天，古也談談，今也談談；

全家老少互慰勉，貧也相安，富也相安。

關於幸福：

相傳幸福是個美麗的玻璃球，跌碎散落在世間的每個角落。

有的人撿到多些，有的人撿到少些，卻沒有人能擁有全部。

愛你所愛選你所選，珍惜現在所擁有的一切。

人活著就是一種心情，把握今天，設置明天，儲存永遠。

只要用心感受，幸福就會永遠存在。

人總是對自己擁有的東西不珍惜，直到不再擁有時才會加倍懷念，

而在得知自己快失去自己所擁有的東西而又無能為力時，

就尋死覓活地不肯放手，歇斯底里往往發生在這個時候，

而對於生命的執著確實是到死才放手！

人生，沒有那麼簡單……

幸福伴隨悲傷，快樂總和痛苦相伴，這就是人生。

今天總要過去，明天充滿未知，自己活得快樂沒有遺憾就好。

谢谢 CrAzy KopiTiam 的文章

读后感：

感觉，

人越大，却越执着；

明白，却很难办到；

有了遗憾，才后悔。

人就是这么犯贱。

Signing off. Off to study. :)

一个星期

2011-02-21T02:49:00.002+08:00

喜怒哀乐却都齐

2月14日

情人节，也是我们交往的第五个月。❤

一顿烛光晚餐，一束百合，一包巧克力
都足以让我惊喜，感动，一生难忘
你的心思，我感受到了
你的付出，我看到了
你对我说的我爱你，我也听到了。
这是你陪我度过的第一个情人节，下个呢？
我希望男主角还是你

那晚，你答应我留了下来
你抱着我，我在你胸膛睡着
好安心，好温暖，好幸福
第一次，我终于可以安稳地睡着了
不过快乐的时光总是短暂的，
你的手臂开始酸痛，麻痹
侧过身，你问我“能吗？”
我忍心说不吗
按着隐隐作痛的心，转过身，背着你
不喜欢看见你的背影，会显得我更落寞
之后，并没有睡好
缩起双腿凝望着夜空只有一颗星星在闪烁着
让我想起了一首儿歌
『天上的星星不说话，地上的娃娃想妈妈。。。』

我想妈妈了
想想她现在在哪儿
想想她现在过得好吗
想想我何时才能和她相见呢
早在眼眶里打滚的泪已沾湿了我的脸颊

你惊醒，发现了我，但我却不想让你发现我在哭泣
我毅然地背着你，你却坚持拥我入怀
最后还是让你知道了
我越有挣扎你却越抱得我更紧
我真的好想好想紧紧紧紧地抱着你
不想言语只想好好的睡一觉

2月15日

你让我赖床，让我在你怀里撒娇
我相信我是幸福的

爱面子好强的你
害怕看到别人异样的眼神
怕他们嘲笑你学游泳的模样
亲爱的别怕别慌
我在你的身边不需要在意别人
你是为了我努力为了我改变
我以你为豪以你为荣
别人要怎么想就随他们
最重要的是我不是吗傻佬？

2月16日

原本是开开心心的
我不懂我的那么多举动让你不开心了
我不懂从几何时你对我的玩笑当真了
我们有了第一次的争吵
你大声的对我说话我真的被吓到了
我开始真正的感到害怕
害怕有了第一次争吵就会接踵而来
直到了无法挽回的地步
我真的怕。。。

2月17日

还以为当做没事一切都会风平浪静
我终究还是惹到你了
当你送我到家门时头也不回进了电梯
心有种莫名的疼痛揪着我很痛很痛

躲进房内试着发泄
眼泪却好像干枯了挤也挤不出
好像有千把万把刀狠狠的刺进我的心
很痛却叫不出哭不出
我知道自己快要崩溃了不能再待在房里
我需要一个能喘气冷静的空间
你们都出门了我也偷溜了
在一排又一排的店铺徘徊流浪
天真的好黑路也好黑
心情也陷入掉入谷底

手机的屏幕不停的在闪耀着显示着你的号码
我不想接不想听
我知道你肯定着急透了
可我找不到按下接听键的力气
只好望着屏幕望着你的脸傻傻的往前走
最后我还是接听了告诉你我快要回家了

你却坚持下来找我还是把我找到了
握着我的手你告诉我
下次不能再自己一个人走在街上
我无言对着你勉强的微笑
我强忍着自己的眼泪
可当你红着眼眶告诉我你有多担心时
我的眼泪却倾盆而下不受控制一行一行流了下来

再一次当你问我发生什么事的时候
告诉了你我的担心我的害怕
一边说眼泪一边狂流
最后我无法一字一句告诉你
放任了自己在你面前大哭哭得心快痛死

你安抚我为我拭去眼泪我知道你也在哭泣
你答应我你会改我相信你
你说第二天会是我们全新的开始
我深信不疑，真的。。。

2月18日

虽然心情未完全恢复可我相信我们会好的
临回家前我给了你一个深深的吻
吻掉我们的伤痛希望一切能恢复从前

2月19日

早上我跟你开了个玩笑你却又当真了
我开始害怕自己对你说的每一句话做的每一个举动
害怕你会生气你会伤心你会难过你会责怪我
我不懂要怎么和你说话了
感觉说多错多越做越错
我们之间到底怎么了？

之后我潜意识里小心翼翼对你说的每一句话
因为我怕我害怕害怕我们争吵害怕你生气
我一直在迁就你不敢顶撞你不敢回话
你安慰我说不用紧当回自己
那你知道吗我真的有多害怕吗
是很怕很怕像是在发一场不醒的恶梦

对不起我还是让你生气
让你带着失望心碎入睡
对不起是我不对我不该对你说那些有的没的

我只想找回从前的我们，当时的我们笑得好灿烂，好幸福。
只不过，那些时光却不知何从去了
我们为什么会到如此的地步
为什么。。。
祈求能找会属于我们的幸福我们的快乐

是谁错谁对都已无所谓
我只想我们能坐下好好地谈
谈谈问题该怎么解决
谈谈未来的路该怎么走
谈谈什么都好
只要都为我们好

想念我们的笑容我们的单纯。。。

亲爱的，我是真的 爱你。。。

Cry Baby

2011-01-27T02:52:00.001+08:00

I have become one :(

My tear gland is very progressive these days. Sometimes it rolls down to my cheek without me realizing it. Simply just because I am a sensitive girl who thinks a lot all the time. And most of time, I will put the thoughts on the negative side in the end. What next then? I will be ended up crying, crying in the pillow during midnight. No one can see and no one can hear. The very next day, without fail, I would act as if there was nothing going wrong the previous night. Putting up a smile, giggle at the right time. Be who I am supposed to be. :)

Most of the time, I keep wondering... Why am I making things so hard to go on for us every time? Why am I being so forceful and demanding to you? Why?! Why?! Why?!

My tears just couldnt stop. Like running water tap, it keep rolling down from the corner of my eyes.

Maybe I am just too rely on you. Way too rely till I lost myself in the midst. I aint the strong person that I used to be last time. I drop tears easily in front of you. And you, I know, seeing me crying, didnt know how to react, didnt know how to comfort me, couldnt find a right word to say, I guess. And I tell myself, what do you expect? Haha.

Now, I am learning to hold back my tears again. Hold it tight inside my eyes, never let it fall in front of you. ~~Tonight,~~ Last night, I told you I am crying. Hoping you would come up and comfort or call me, but you didnt. At that moment, I heard my heart was shattering into pieces. I sat on the bathtub, crying hard, letting all the tears flow out without control and I tell myself "this will be last time that I cry in front of you or even let you know that I cry" . I dont want to see you cry in front of my eyes again because of me. Your tears are much precious than mine. Not worth it for me. I promise, promise you that from now on, I try my very very best not to say something that make you tear anymore. My heart couldnt take it because it aches when I see your tear.

It's 2.44 in the morning now. I couldnt sleep. Once again, staring at the screen, looking what I typed, remembering the scenes, my tears almost wet my eyes. I am just useless, I guess. But promise is a promise, I promise you that the first morning that you see me, I will be fine. I will make myself fine, darling. Really...

Signing off. Take a deep breath and hold back the tears, smile :) You can do it.

You, Him, Her, Them

2011-01-08T17:03:00.001+08:00

it doesnt matter anymore

Well, it turns out something that I have expected but deep down in me, I dont wish it happens. You, him, her or even them, well, it doesnt matter anymore isn't it?

I dont mean a thing to you anymore. Promises are meant to be broken and I absolutely understand that. Life still goes on as the time is ticking away seconds by seconds. I guess I am the one who being emotionally sensitive and after all, I look like an idiot after realizing that. Chuckled on my own thoughts and feelings, this is not the first time, I told myself. Hmm... Shouldn't I have known this way back then?

Well, I guess I still believe in what I believe, and I still have faith in every single friendship that I truly treasure. But only me but not you, him, her or them. Now, I am going to tell myself. Just do what everyone do, why care anyway? It's easy. Put up a big fake smile, hug them and tell them how much you miss them. Pretend. Just like everyone else. :) Life could be better than that after all.

Signing off. Off to bathroom. :)

Last Post Before Final

2010-12-19T23:15:00.001+08:00

fingers crossed for me

After today, I should must really concentrate on my studies for real this time.

Say NO :

Facebook
Blog
Dating
Movies
Shopping
Bejeweled Blitz
Comics
Novels
TV
Laptop
Ice-cream :(
Snacks

Must stay firm with the "No's"! Okay, I must tell myself I can control myself, these temptations wouldn't control over me. Chong Yeen Hoong, self control! You can do it =D

Mr Stalker, I know you are reading this too! So you also must control yourselves. No Facebook! No Games! No TV! No Comics! No SMS. Okay? :) Gambate! I know you can do it too! > . <

To-do list

Study
Study!
Study!!
Study!!!
Study!!!!
Study!!!!!
Study!!!!!!
Study!!!!!!!
Study!!!!!!!!
STUDY!!!!!!!!!

From list one to list ten, it says that I must really study hard from now onwards.

Mr Chew! Remember your promise to me? Remember our promise? You know what is the promise. Dont forget that we have made a pinky promise before.

You promised me :)

Our Pinky Promise ♥

So MUST STUDY HARD! CANNOT BE LAZY! And if possible, dont miss me too much larh. I dont want be a distraction to you :)

Then, after our finals,

we hold hands happily

and

hehe:)

Hei Hei will accompany me for this two weeks :)

Signing off. Off to study :)

Mr Stalker

2010-12-18T18:21:00.009+08:00

didn't expect that you found me here

Yes, I am talking about you. :)

I know you love to stalk everything about me, right? Every single comments that I've posted in Facebook. Every pictures of me. You even googled my name and now you have found my blog! Mr Stalker, hor? I know you are smiling right now in front of your laptop screen. Bluek! Dont deny, I know you well. =D

Let me show you the evidence.

even you also cant believe you ~~like~~ ♥ to stalk me

*click the picture to enlarge*

I know after you seeing this, you will show me this kind of face.

Mr Stalker, Chew Keen Peng! ♥

The sweat me face

See! I know you so well right? You always love to sweat me. Always show me your sweat face. Wait! I think you learn it from me, the "yeen hoong's type of sweat face". Copy cat! *laugh* Never mind. I give you the authority to copy it. Faster say thank you. :)

The noob smiling face!!!

I know you are happy because I posted something about you. Smile :) Yay! Look at you, after ~~doing the bad things~~ stalking me, still smile so happily and showed your rabbit teeth to me. =P

Mr Chew aka Mr Stalker, dont kill me after you read this post. I know you wont because I know YOU LOVE ME TOO MUCH!!! ♥

Peace :)

Signing off. Off for wedding dinner. :)

In A Relationship

2010-12-18T02:16:00.002+08:00

some have happy endings while the others dont :(

I have been blog hopping to many people's blog all the time. Reading blogs is one of the way to keep track with their life.

The most common post that all of them have is about their relationship with their another half. It doesn't matter if they are in the relationship, going to be in the relationship or just ended a relationship. Me too, of course.

Seeing friends who are suffering from their breakup really made my heart skip a beat, pain indeed, especially when I knew the reasons behind the story. I didn't know how to approach them and give them advice or even comfort them. Boo me! I am such a lousy friend and fail the friendship test. :( I ain't a good advisor, but I think I am a good listener. So friend, whenever you need me, I will be there for you to pour out your emotions. :)

Well, betrayal is strictly NOT allowed in a relationship. ~~The one who betrayed, have you ever put yourselves into the one who is being betrayed by you?~~ Okay, I know I am stupid enough to ask such a stupid question. Of course the betrayers will never know, they are hugging the other one happily without any guilt. Whatthehell?!! Seriously, I HATE BETRAYERS! To all the betrayers that hurt my friends, my friends are suffering because of you and you! Dammit! And I believe, what comes around, goes around. It will be your turn next, you will just have to wait and see!

Once a scar, forever a scar. No matter how hard you want to vanish it, it will be scarred in your heart. For me, I can FORGIVE but I cant FORGET.

For my friends, don't be sad. He/ She is not worth your tears. Remember, you have us behind us to support you. No matter how sad you are, please take care of yourselves, you will never know how many people are worrying about you. Dont keep sink yourselves into the pool of memory that hurts. Let it go. Maybe it's easy for me to say. I know it's hard, but keep trying. Dont not give excuse for yourselves to give up. Dont tell me that you have tried your bestest. I dont believe. Pain cant be cured in a month or two. Maybe years. But keep trying and trying. No one says that one must depend on another to live on. What about your life when the one hadnt appear in your life? Weren't you still alive and safe? So friends, Stay strong, stay firm and stay away from negative thoughts. I don't want to see another Alviss Kong that happen to be one of my friend. No way! So, please please please, make sure you are safe and healthy. :)

I will cross my fingers to all of you. To those who are sweetly in a relationship, please appreciate what you have now! Dont be a betrayer!

Friends, I got your back :)

Signing off.

Movies

2010-12-17T02:19:00.002+08:00

It somehow reflects our real life :)

This year, for all these years that I have been living, it's the most movies that I have watched especially with him.♥

Recently, we have watched

Harry Potter and The Deadly Hallows

We watched it with my siblings :D

RAPUNZEL: The Tangled Tale ♥

When I first told him, he refused to watch. Now now he likes it. Silly boy :)

His favourite- The chameleon

Pascal

The Longest Hair Princess ♥

RAPUNZEL ♥♥♥

The "Prince"

Flynn Rider / Eugene

The Determined Horse

Maximus!!!

The Intimating Gang

The Pub Thugs

I love Cartoons. ♥♥♥ Dont you think that all the cartoon characters are too adorable to resist? I always like the happy ending of every cartoons even though they always end with "they lived happily ever after". I dont live in fairy tales but I do enjoy fairy tales. But this is the last cartoon that Disney produced :( Why why why? Then what should the kids watch? Aww... Hope Disney would change their minds. I am looking forward for another Disney Cartoon. :)

Tomorrow, we are going to watch this! He wants to watch so badly. =) It better turns out to be a funny one if not he will be so dead. :D We are going to laugh and laugh and laugh like nobody business. :P Please dont stare at us. Bluek!

Just Call Me Nobody

After that, we are going for shopping! With him, I always love to shop. No reason. :)

Oops! I have passed the time limit that I promised.

Signing off.

Happy 3 Months Anniversary ♥

2010-12-14T00:42:00.004+08:00

there will be more 3 months to come :)

Happy 3 Months Anniversary, Darling ♥

I'm

here

officially

announce

your

3 months' CURSE

BROKEN!

♥

I ♥ You

and

I know YOU too! :)

Annoying

2010-12-12T22:18:00.001+08:00

you always are

Uh-please. This is the N times you got on my nerves. When will you stop annoying me? I still talk to you means I still give my little respect to you. And I am holding on with my anger because I still want my dad to be happy. So can you please not to be too over?!

Plus, can you please respect my dad?! He is elder than you weih! And you are being rude to him as if you are the elder one. Dont think you are the smartest AND the brilliant ones on earth. YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT. why must I always listen to you? You are not my mum okay?! a

and when my dad is scolding any one of us, please do not interfere or even give any comments! We dont need that. And stop acting like a mother! Because you are not one of them. Unmarried. No children. What rights do you have to interfere our life? Just play your role enough. We dont need you to take care of us. Just take care of yourselves is more than enough. I dont need your care neither my siblings need too.

Whenever you are around me, I just cant feel right. I wanna run away from home. Far away from you. Goodness. I never thought I will angry or dislike you this much back then. and now I can feel the anger and the frustration towards you.

Well, whenever talk about you, it will ruin my mood. Dammit! I shall stop now. Like what he told me, dont care about her. Hehe:)

Signing off.

对不起

2010-09-16T02:08:00.000+08:00

我并不值得

对你，真的只能说声抱歉了。我知道对你的伤害已造成了，再多说也没有用。可是除了对不起之外，我什么都无法给你了。所以我只能拼命在心里对你重复“对不起”这三个字。对不起，对不起，对不起，真的很对不起。。。

对你，我还有无尽的感激。谢谢你一直以来对我的照顾，对我的关怀。谢谢你包容了我的任性，我的坏脾气。谢谢你在我伤心时给我的安慰，给我的鼓励。谢谢你在我需要帮忙时，从不说不。我知道你对我很好很好，我是知道的。只是我并不知道的是你对我的好已超越了好朋友的界限。

也许我是个感情白痴吧！也很迟钝！

我相信你会找到一个比我更好的女生，一个值得让你付出你真心的女孩。很遗憾的，我无缘当上属于你的那个女孩。因为一颗心真的只能装得下一个人而已。而我，却给了他。所以，我并不值得。不要为了我这棵烂了的树，放弃了整片绿油油的森林。你有更好的选择。真的。我不是个好女孩，不要为了我而忽略了其他更好的女孩。

也许，我们只能做好朋友而已。我相信你会是我一辈子的好朋友。你是个很好很好的朋友。不介意付出，也不要求回报。所以说真的，我并不希望你会躲我，避开我。不过，如果说不看到我会让你更好过的话，我会躲你躲得远远的，尽量不让你看见，直到我对你造成的伤害恢复为止。不过，我更加希望我们能像从前一样打闹着，一样能互相嘲笑对方。我真的很希望。。。

最后，我希望你快乐，幸福。我希望能看到你像从前一样，无忧无虑地大笑。不要再对我执着了，我真的。。。不。。。值。。。得！

Something You Don't Know

2010-08-29T19:23:00.000+08:00

and something you never expect...

To: My dear friend (you know who you are),

Darling, I know this will be a hard time for you to get over him. I don't know how much he was meant to you last time, I am not you. I can't feel what you are feeling right now. But you have to go through this stage. Don't lose hope in your life. He is not everything in your life. I know he has left you a scar in your heart. Believe me, the wound will heal one day. Keep believing that you will find a better one. You can do better than he does. Make him realized that he was wrong to hurt you and let you go. Make him feels sorry to you. You definitely can live without him.

However, you must promise me not to hurt yourself anymore. Okay? I don't wish to hear that you soaked your pillows every night. He does not worth your tears. Don't let him be your barrier to continue on. I will be always here if you need me. And I want you to remember that by heart. I don't know what else I can do for you besides listening to you and giving you a piece of my mind. I know whatever I said, you might have heard it gazillions times. There's no one can help you to pull through this moment besides yourself. You must have the urge to get rid of him out of your mind. I believe that after all these, you can be a better person.

Lastly, i know that he once played an important part of your life. It's time to move on. It's time to let him go out of your heart. I know I repeated this many times and you might already annoyed. But you really must have the strong heart to resist him. Don't let him appear in your mind again. Delete everything that belongs to him, throw away every memory with him. You will feel better. Out of sight, out of mind.

You are a tough girl. Stay strong. Do not let your parents worry about you. And us also. We will always support you. If you need someone to talk, my phone will be on for 24 hours. I wish I could give you a hug now and tell you everything will be over soon, everything will be alright. :/

Take care ya till the day we meet again. :)

Love,
-yh-

~~I am scared of the arrival of tomorrow,~~

~~I have no idea how to treat you as normal.~~

I miss you ♥

I am afraid

2010-08-28T00:59:00.000+08:00

afraid that this is not real...

I wish that this is not dreaming. You seems so near yet so far from me. Everything just seems an illusion to me. I don't know what I should do. I am afraid that you might slip away from me without me knowing it one day. I am afraid that history might repeat itself again.

I keep telling that you will be different. I should have more confident in myself. But I am still in miserable. Communication seems to be the biggest barrier we are facing now. If that's the case, I am really afraid that we might get awkward when see each other in real life. I don't wish this to happen to us, I really don't want to run away from you when I see you. Please assure me that everything will be alright for us, will you? I am feeling unsecured now. I need to see you now more than ever. I wish you can hug me tightly and say we will be fine. Am I asking too much? But I really need you besides me now even just sitting quietly besides me, not saying a word. At least I can feel that you are for real, not my own imagination.

I don't want wake up in tears the next morning and only realized it is merely just a dream. You know how sensitive I am sometimes. Yes, I know I think too much as you always said that to me. But do you know why I am thinking that much? It's because I care, I care about you, I care bout us and I care about everything. :( Why are we making this hard for us to go on? I am scared that we might stuck in the middle of nowhere now which there is no turning back and don't know how to continue on. I don't want!!!

Gosh! What's wrong with me?! Final exams are nearing. No! It's NEXT WEEK! And I am here thinking nonsense and writing rubbish here. I don't know who to tell. I am such a failure.

Now I need a way for me to concentrate! Please brain, can you please once listen to my command and let me pull through the papers. After that, I will let all the emotions rush through every single part of my body as you wish. Till then, I really need to focus!!! I know I can do it. Yes, I can. :)

I really miss you. :(

You Are The Reason For Me To Smile :)

2010-07-26T00:12:00.000+08:00

Yes. You! :)

Semester Two life is getting more and more hectic, I supposed. Tonnes and tonnes of assignments to be handed in. Presentations over and over again. Endless and endless exams. Meetings and more meetings. Oh no! What did I get myself into?

Yeah, life has been a mess lately. Stress is back into my dictionary again. Did I mention before stress is also a kind of motivation? I just discovered that stress can actually work better and know more about myself. I always thought that I have known myself very well for all these years. I was wrong, very wrong. Maybe it's time to rediscover myself.

Luckily, I know I am not alone. Family and friends are always there for me. I know they will. =) You guys are the one who keep me moving forward with strength. And God too for He is the one who guide me through sorrows and sadness in my life.

I miss you. ❤

Am I Thinking Too Much Again?

2010-07-18T19:10:00.000+08:00

I think I am... Sighs

Can you please tell me exactly what are you thinking? =( I really have no idea what's in your mind when you said those words. A friend's concern? Perhaps I was always the one who misunderstood and tried to make things complicated.

MAYBE, it's time for me to let go. I dont want to live in miserable anymore. I couldn't concentrate because of you. Sighs.

Staying where we are now is the best way. =) You will always be my good friend.

You are Getting On My Nerves Lately

2010-07-07T01:07:00.001+08:00

Can you please disappear from my sight?!

What's wrong with you recently? Menopause? Or you have nothing better to do but to keep finding faults for three of us. Bloody Hell man! We always got scolded by daddy just because of your nonsense. Whatthehell?!!!

For your information, I am not your maid! I don't need MONEY as incentive. What?! You think money can solve anything and everything? Sorry, I am not that kind of person who desperate for money. I wash and iron the clothes, sweep and mop the floor, I have never ever mention that I need money as return! Don't ask my dad to give me money. I am her daughter! Not his personal MAID! Stop using money to ask me do this and that. Do not bribe me! Didn't iron your clothes is my fault? Damn you! I was being so kind-hearted enough to wash your clothes and iron your clothes! And I know you did it on purpose! You wanted me to be scolded. You have tonnes of clothes in your cupboard! And you think that I don't know? I am not some dumb-ass okay!

By the way, who do you think you are? Instruct my dad to do this and that for you. He has to listen every single of your words? Excuse me, he is elder than you! F*** you man! You are such a pain for me. I don't know what you have contributed to MY family ever since you have moved here. When I thought back what you said to other people last time, I feel like laughing.Being such a faker that you said that you would take care of three of us. That was the most HILARIOUS thing that I have ever heard! You have never cook once for us, my dad is always the one who does the cooking. He cooks for you! Don't you ever feel guilty that your elder brother is cooking for you???!!!! Next, you have never do housechores. Even simple thing like sweeping the floor. You have never make effort to do that too! Every Saturday morning, I always see you lazing on the sofa after taking your breakfast. Whatthehell?! Its like you got up from the bed just for a cup of coffee and you go back to sleep again??? Oh my gawd! I swear that I have never seen such a terrible person before.

I don't know what kind of life you had been through all these years. Being a WOMAN! You don't even know how to wash your clothes, iron your own clothes and whatnot. Your mother didnt teach you that since she always thought that she was the best.

I seriously hate you till the maximum! I don't want to live under the same roof top as you. I don;t want to share the same room with you. I don't want to eat together with you. I don't want to see you right in front of my eyes everytime I reach the doorstep. I don't want to hear any sounds from you. Just disappear! I don't care where you want to go, I just want you to vanish into thin air and never appear again!

You are basically getting on my nerves EVERY SINGLE DAY! And I can't take it anymore. For the next time, I won't tolerate anymore. Don't treat me as a kid as I am not. I am already 18 years old. I don't need you to be so busy-body to interfere my life. I will take control of my own life. It's totally out of your business!

I really really hate you! You are making me to have another sleepless night again! DAMN YOU!

Stop Acting Like You Know Me Well

2010-04-14T00:46:00.000+08:00

because you don't

I don't know if I am ~~having PMS~~ over-sensitive lately. I just don't feel like talking to you anymore as I did last time.

You are annoying me days by days. Your lame jokes. Your so-called advices. Your terrifying singing. Your compliments towards your gang of ~~intelligent~~ friends. You are really getting on my nerves now. Could you please SHUT UP! I am a coward for not saying this right in front of your face.

I don't care if you are sitting with us or with your friends. Please, don't act as if you are that important for you were only part of us back then.

And most importantly, STOP TELLING ME WHO I AM SUPPOSED TO BE, I AM who I AM. I don't need someone to tell me that by doing this or that only sounds like Chong Yeen Hoong. For goodness's sake, how long have you known me? 3 months? And you called that you know me well? Uh-please,you don't. Others might know me better than you.

I know I am mean.
But I am not mean enough to blurt out everything in front of you.
I know I am not smart.
But I am smart enough to overtake you
I know I am not pretty
But I am happy for who I am

And I know that I am really piss off at you now!

Life Can't Be Interesting All The Time

2010-04-05T00:55:00.002+08:00

but can be boring most of the time

I have just realised my life isn't interesting. It's plain boring. For example, my life is a glass of plain mineral water while others is a glass of punch. When I signed in my blog, I would always stared ~~blankly~~ at the screen, thinking of what to write. But no matter how hard I squeezed my brain juice to think, I got nothing in my mind. Not even a little of thing I want to share in my life. But some stupid incidents I would like to share face to face with people not by deadly black and white words.Everything that I am doing is a routine everyday. Nothing special. Nothing is memorable.

Worst still, when I have the urge to blog, to blurt out the things in my mind, I would realised how suck my English is. It has been ages that I didn't write essays either in English, BM or even Mandarin. My writing skill is getting from bad to worse, and I know it would eventually turns into worst. My Goodness. This reminds me how ~~good~~ okay my English was back then.

Now, sitting in front of the dekstop, pressing the keys on the keyboard. Backspacing and retyping. Sighs. I need someone to brush up my English!!!

Bye, Giap. No more jokes from you.No more hear you saying me "Fak Hao". No more class rep for TY3. No more your presence in the class. =(

You will be missed.

We will miss your laughter.

We will miss everything about you.=)

This might be the last post I will be writing about my life. After all, I might continue with some short stories that I come up myself. XD

The Road Not Taken May Leads to A Brighter Way

2010-03-30T01:14:00.001+08:00

which is the one?

Foundation might seems like a better way for me to pursue on. Many people have advised me to continue on with it. There are more to come to persuade me. Furthermore, I know that I would surely finish my degree earlier than others.

Form 6? How? I don't have the feeling of hatred for form 6 now just like the past. Form 6 is a way that I could cut down my education cost yet can also bring me the same effect as what foundation would give me in the end. But it is risky. I cannot be playful anymore as what I did in the past during my high school.It might turn out to be a disaster.

Dilemma.

Which way to go? Someone please tell me.

There's no U-turn in life. Sighs.

There's Always A Tomorrow to Look Foward

2010-03-16T00:22:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow shall be a better day

My pre-U courses really drive me crazy ~~sometimes~~ most of the time. And now I have came to realize that how bad the effect of spoon-feeding by parents and teachers. In primary school, because we were still small and young, we are always being protected and pampered for everything. In Secondary school, when we came across assignments and projects, there was always a teacher behind to guide you through step by step until you got everything right. Now, being a 18 years old, attending for college, assignments are meant to be do by yourselves and these have caused me in trouble that I couldn't do it on my own without any plagiarisms from internet. AND THAT'S REALLY A SAD CASE!!! Even though all the assignments are in groups, but all of us have totally no idea how to start. My classmates are really awesome, no doubt. But for some reasons, sometimes I do get annoyed by small little tiny matter or by someone's unintentional action.I hope they won't bump into my blog and see this.

I have no idea how to blog now. Blogging seems like a stressful work to me now as compared to last time where I could typed whatever I wish. But now, I just don't have any idea what happen to me. sighs.

Moved Back

2010-03-07T14:04:00.000+08:00

Finally made a decision to move back here. The new blog's layout is too troublesome for people to view.

So I am back!!!!